Discipline and punishment is a difficult area in a loving FLR. I have a marriage based on love and the implicit agreement of the transfer of power to one person: me. So this gives me challenges.
I employ discipline and punishment to make it work as an FLR but I differentiate between them.
I must add before I explain that my views on this area are merely my own opinions based on what I have found works for me.
Discipline vs Punishment in my FLR
In my own world of femdom and FLR discipline is the method I use to maintain control in the relationship and punishment is the penalty mechansism I use when Alice shows a lack of discipline. Punishment is often physical but may also be non-physical, a withdrawal of certain rights for example. Discipline is all about the rules and behaviours I expect which cement my authority but may also involve physical spanking.
Let me explain what I’m getting at by looking at each of the two areas separately.
How I use Discipline in my FLR
So my discipline is based on Alice following my rules. Obviously the over-arching rule is that I am in charge and my decision is final. In practice our loving FLR has dialogue and even some negotiation. Alice is an intelligent girl so can have opinions and ideas as well. I’ll look at each of my main discipline rules.
- Enforced feminisation. Alice has to be a girl. I know many FLRs and femdom relationships don’t use feminisation but this is discipline rule number one for me. I expect her in female ‘wear’ at all times at home, female underwear outside and to have a female beauty regime. When I say female ‘wear’, I may actually want her naked for the day or evening but she has to wear high heels, wig and have her face and nails made up as a minimum. Maintaining this discipline establishes my authority and control since Alice never actually wanted to be a girl although she has become accustomed to it over time. It accentuates her submissiveness and it’s a great discipline for her to take care of herself. Much of the female lifestyle has now become ingrained in her day to day life without any need for me to get involved.
- Demonstrate respect. Alice must always show respect to me as the authority figure. This discipline involves curtseying, maintaining the home as a housewife, kneeling before me, massaging and washing my feet after a hard day and so on. She must always call me Mistress. I consider that her using my first name is disrespectful. The area of respect is what makes an FLR so rewarding to any alpha lady like me.
- Maintenance spankings. This discipline enforces the difference in status. She has to drop her knickers, raise her skirt and bend over. I used to put her over my knee but I can’t get such as good swing so I prefer her on all fours. I use hand, crop or wooden spatula. Besides being a necessary discipline I do so enjoy it. There’s something about the feeling of power when spanking a naughty girly husband.
- Clitty control and feminisation. Males think their little willies are so important and masculine so it’s necessary to have this discipline to demonstrate that it’s insignificant. It’s the final element to ensure removal of nasty masculine traits once you’ve feminised him. I renamed it a clitty a long time ago and the whole area is her pussy. I ask Alice to tell me who owns it and tell me how feminine it is, especially with a cure little triangle of pubic hair. I’ve recently and belatedly come round to the benefits of a cock cage to further diminish it.
How I use Punishment in my FLR
Alice isn’t a bad girl but at times she does forget that things aren’t equal in our relationship. I don’t punish her a whole lot these days as my discipline regime seems to work, on the whole. If I do feel that punishment is needed it could range from her having to stand in the corner, being made to sit on the floor and removing her clothing through to actual spanking. I do tend to spank that much harder if it’s for punishment and I may even spank or slap without warning. Without-warning spanks will be on her bum, legs, clitty/pussy or occasionally around her face. I never kick but I do hit her with my open hand on her clitty through her knickers if she’s been naughty, usually talking back to me or making excuses.
Generally I prefer to inform her that she’s been bad and tell her to get the wooden spoon or spatula or crop and then she has to present her bared bum for punishment.
Discipline and punishment work together
I prefer to focus on discipline to make our FLR work smoothly. As a happily married couple, our FLR provides the framework for our daily lives. As the leader it falls on me to make sure that we don’t stray from the discipline rules that make it work successfully. Alice may moan at times but fully accepts that in the end that I’m right to operate it the way I do.
Discipline and punishment is a difficult area in a loving relationship but it’s necessary in an FLR to enforce the transfer of power to the lady of the house. Me.