Away from the fantasy femdom blogs and Tumblr and Pinterest’s photo-shopped and staged images, real-life FLR and feminisation thrives. Whilst the lady of the house is very much in charge, the relationship is not abusive as in the fake blogs but loving and caring. That’s the whole point.
Recently I have been in communication with Cathy from the USA. She lives in an FLR with her feminised husband ‘Mary’. Her story is very similar to my own.
This post tells Cathy’s real-life FLR and feminized husband story.
FLRs with Feminised Husbands are the Key to Happy and Harmonious Relationships
Before we get to Cathy’s story a little background on real-life FLRs.
An FLR will always be far more harmonious than a male-led or equal relationship. Decision-making is the woman's and masculine traits such as competitiveness and aggression are eliminated.the relationship is built on superior female values.Click To TweetNot all FLRs involve feminisation of the husband but I believe this to be an important element of any female-led relationship. Feminisation improves a male in every way, from hygiene to gentleness through to manner and clothing. It also adds a certain frisson to the situation which is fun.
This is the approach I took to my marriage and is how Cathy looks at things. I believe that male feminization should ensure males look and act as much like normal women as possible but be submissive to the real lady. They are not real women of coruse and not caricature sissies either, as fun as that can be to play at times.
Cathy’s FLR is a great model for all marriages and relationships. Here’s her story along with some photos of her pretty husband Mary.
I love everything about it.
A Loving FLR
Cathy and Mary are two Los Angeles empty-nesters now enjoying new privacy-freedom at home to explore gender. Cathy is constantly surprised and glad to have ended up with a fun gentle feminine husband now renamed Mary. Both are so happy.
Here’s Cathy’s story in her words. She uses he and him to be clear she’s refering to her husband.
Cathy’s encouraged feminisation and FLR story
My husband now has his own lingerie drawer in his dresser, no more sharing my things. He has his own feminine clothes hanging in our large walk-in closet alongside his male clothes. Everything we do is together and I’m never condescending to him or set out to embarrass him.
All his lingerie and clothes are average everyday styles that match well, have nice styles, and are easy to accessorize. All classics for skirts, tops, blouses, dresses, mixed with nice contemporary looks like skinny jeans, boots, flowing Boho tops and knit sweaters. All pastel pinks, peach, lavender, yellows, ivory, baby blue. Rayon, crêpe, satin, silk, lacy, bows.
He’s now completely into it all, I never mock or tease, I always compliment and encourage and tell how much I love him and how special this is for us. We could have never done this when our kids were younger and home, but what a great time we’re having in our empty nest phase of life.
His entire body is shaved clean and smooth daily before appying scented lotions, daily hair conditioner, and Olay skin cream,. His shoulder length hair is easy to do into 2 or 3 cute female styles. He has progressed to daily maxi pads in very tight panties with lovely flat “v” front appearance.
We cook, we read books and magazines and sip wine. There are no more boring sports and sci-fi TV programmes for Mary, it’s now romantic movies and documentaries, plus home and garden and cooking shows. He (she) helps with the laundry, ironing, cleaning, makes our bed each morning. It’s amazing to have such a lovely new roommate.
How I Feminized my Husband
It has been quite a challenge to find other couples who are doing similar to how Mike and I have been living behind closed doors these last few years. It’s why I wrote to Lady Alexa, just to share experiences.
Our empty nest started in 2009. For the next four and a half years it was dull. We had a great deal of boredom and routine in our daily life. We both still commuted to work each day, came home, ate dinner, collapsed on the couch watching TV and then went to bed. It was then the same thing next day and five days a week.
We still had a loving relationship but there was no spark and nothing spontaneous. It was very predictable.
Getting ready
Early in 2014, we had a long weekend coming up with heavy rains and chilly temperatures. I joked about doing an all-day inside spa-type day at home. He agreed. We started with showering together which was very good fun.
We progressed to me shaving my legs and underarms while he shaved his face smooth. He has little body hair naturally but in a playful moment, I offered to shave his legs of the thin blonde hairs he had. He went along with it. I joked about his underarms and he let me do this area too.
So we got out of the shower and I joked about moving his towel up over his chest and under his arms like me. He did it. He had mid-length hair over his ears so I made him sit in front of the vanity mirror and I brushed his hair into a style like mine.
I then proposed we do hot oil conditioner treatment and facial masques. He did my hair, I did his. We had our orange mud masques and I put did moisturizer on my silky legs and he let me do his too.
While we waited 20 minutes on masques and oil in our hair. I did my nails with polish and could not help but offer to do his. Again said OK. Then I did our toenails. Waiting for the polish to dry we laughed as we sat and looked at each other in towels, hair slicked back in oil, masques with light maroon fingers and toes and super silky smooth legs.
Well oh my, we went back in the hot shower, rinsed our hair and washed off the masques. I could not keep my hands off his smooth body.
We went back out to dry off and I blow-dried my hair, then his. I did my flat-iron and had him sit while I straightened his too. He looked so calm and relaxed in his towel, polished nails, all smooth with very feminine looking bob and bangs (fringe for UK readers – Lady Alexa).
He offered to give me a back massage on our bed with coconut lotion. He did my back, arms, legs, then I had him lie down and did the same. It was so exotic to feel his clean and silky smooth body as I massaged him all over.
Preparation
I said I was going to do my make up and then cook us a lovely dinner with candlelights. He came and sat next to me at my vanity and watched me. I could not resist being playful and started with a small dab of foundation and it all progressed to doing my face then his, back and forth with eye liner, then shadow, then mascara, light blusher and finally lipstick with that wispy hair.
My goodness, was this attractive woman my husband? He thought it was a game but I loved what I saw.
I left him sitting there and went to my dresser to get bra and panties, and had a rush of “why not?” I got a second bra and panty set as I walked back to him and dropped the other on his lap and gave him a reassuring, “Hey, it’s just us, right?” I put on my bra and panties and he did the same.
He had a loose chest – former muscles gone soft. He looked nice in the bra and panties. He stopped all upper body workouts age 50. It took a few years but his chest muscles atrophied into some nice loose tissue to start with.
Now, years later, fenugreek capsules and progesterone cream massage, plus his natural low-T stage of life, all have come together nicely and he has soft rounded jiggly full 36B breasts. they’re even more convincing in padded push-up bras as you can see in the photo below.
His best look is adhesive Nu-Bra squeeze his breast tissue into very deep cleavage then push up bra over that. With a clingy knit top with deep scoop-neck or V-neck he looks amazing!
Anyway, back to 2014. I put on my long pink cotton robe and I pulled my hair up in a scrunchy getting ready to make dinner. My husband put on his white terry robe and I pulled his hair up in a scrunchy too. I made dinner, he set the table.
A cold and windy night
We had on lovely classical music and it was dark outside and raining. He turned on the fire and poured some wine. We toasted glasses in the kitchen with about 10 minutes until dinner would be ready from the oven.
I just could not resist it and said it was time to finish getting dressed for this elegant dinner. I asked him to join me in our large walk-in closet. It was so sweet to see him so demure, quiet, relaxed, calm as I selected a dress for myself and asked him point black which dress he would like to wear.
Now he started to worry. I chose for him and laid the dresses on the bed and went back to my dresser. The kidding had moved to more of a “are we really doing this?” apprehension from him. I kept it light and fun and joked while reminding him again, “it’s just us“.
I put on a full slip, I gave him a half slip and lacy camisole. Next were nude lace-top thigh highs for me and the same in barely black for my husband. My heart was rushing to see him in my lingerie. He put them on although he looked sheepish.
We then put on the dresses. I went to the closet and found a small heel for me and sling-back flats for him to give extra room around his heel for his size; size 11 (US) to fit my ladies size 10s (US).
I then got my jewellery box and we just had fun. Rings, bracelets, necklaces, watches, and my bower earrings clicked to his lobes. They stayed in place, looking like they were in holes.
Back at the vanity unit, I sat and he watched me brush out and style my hair with hairspray. I then squirted on some perfume. We switched places and I brushed out his hair and styled it into a cut flip on top with bangs and did a hair clip up on one side and long over his ears on the other. I used lots of hairspray to hold that look and then perfume spritz to neck hair and wrists.
He stood up and we were side by side looking in the large mirror and the more I smiled. So did he finally. That sheepish expression returned to his face.
Two girls and an evening meal
We returned to the kitchen and we served the dinner, poured more wine, came out to the dinning table and sat. He lit romantic, candles, the fireplace was roaring, the music great, and the rain and wind outside. And my husband in a Lauren rayon flowered step-in sheath dress with 3/4 sleeves zipped up at the back. He looks so cute – very feminine – very much like a woman. And he’s okay with this? Wow!
We ate, we talked, we laughed, he listened, we smiled, he slowed down from his usual kinetic pace to be more relaxed and calm. He went to get me second helpings from the kitchen; he stood and walked and sat again calmer and slower paced.
It was obvious he was very much okay with being in full lingerie and a dress with make-up jewellery – his hair styled nails and perfume. We had dessert on the couch with coffee. Then more wine as we kept talking.
My main comment on the couch was, “We have GOT to do this again, OK Honey?“
He smiled and agreed. I think he felt a bit uneasy but also safe and secure. I was not teasing or mocking but reassuring him that it’s OK to like pretty clothes and a quiet evening. I kept reminding him it was good for him to experience first hand how I feel when I’m all dressed up and out for a special evening.
I’ll never forget we finished in the living room with me reminding him that these clothes make me feel sexy. I asked him flat-out, “Do you feel sexy too dressed up like this too?“
He smiled and said he did. With that, we got up and went to the bedroom for a few hours of several ‘firsts’ for our marriage.
We woke up next morning, I kept it light. I didn’t push it too much and after coffee and muffins, I gently helped with make-up remover. We showered, put on our regular clothes and has a nice relaxing Saturday.
Increasing my Husband’s Feminization
After our first spa-day evening of crazy firsts with lots of experimenting, we had a very quiet three or four days to not talk much about all we did and just kind of process it, think about it a lot.
Thankfully, his embarrassment and feeling awkward was easily smoothed over by my kind words and telling him how much I love him and how we have this new situation of the house to ourselves. I told him it’s completely OK to try new things. Stuff like that.
Rolling forward to now, we’re at the place now where I no longer help dress him. He does it all by himself. The extent he decides to go to on any given day I leave up to him. So some days it’s panties and bra, skinny jeans and a knit top, no full make-up just some lipstick and maybe he touches up his lashes a bit with a little mascara, and just small earrings and thin watch.
He still works from his office here in our home above the garage, usually 2 or 3 days a week from 9am-3pm remote connect to his firm’s network. So most of those days I love to see him take such care to have a very “office” business professional look with either a skirt-blouse-blazer or classic dress with a sweater.
He’ll do full make up on “work days” and I’ll either bring up lunch to the loft and eat with him, or he’ll come down and into the house and we eat on the deck or the patio. So fun to walk in quietly on him from behind to see bra-slip-camisole straps showing through under a light thin and airy blouse across his back. Hair up in a twist and scrunchy. My lovely little office gal.
The housemaid
I got very playful about a year ago when he was helping with house work, dusting, mopping the kitchen, vacuuming the carpet, and joked he could make good money with his own cleaning service, like Molly Maids here in The States.
Long story short, we kidded a bit more and talked about it and I asked if we could role-play it sometime where he is at the front door arriving at his house cleaning job – our house – and I show him around, and leave him to it. I joked a lot about tipping him if he did a really nice job.
So last Fall we went to WaitStuff.com and bought Edwards Garment Junior Cord Housekeeping Dress in light grey and white trim, white apron. And Payless had some cute white rubber soled white work-flats, so it’s very fun to once a week, usually Thursdays have him wear that with grey thigh-highs and I just imagine I have a real housekeeping service as I read a magazine or sew or paint and sip my coffee while he’s busy cleaning.
Again, he’s so cute with hair up in twist and matching white scrunchy. I really want to take the role play to where I corner “her” accidentally in the bedroom while making the bed or cleaning the master bath and one thing leads to another, right? It’d be so fun to do it with my housekeeper then she has to get all straightened up again to finish work.
We have also settled into similar prep for our intimacy times. We’re both middle-aged so for me I have to use a good amount of K-Y because of my body dryness. I do that before we meet on the bed.
We’re now at the place where he also wears and bra and sexy panty like me, AND he has his own tube of K-Y and gets himself very wet and slippery before coming to bed.
I never even thought to finger him for all those years when the kids were living at home, and now the last couple years it’s become such a fun thing to sometimes panties to the side, sometimes over the panties and push them up inside too, and always start with one finger and then do two.
The best thing is he is so kind and soft and smooth and gentle and takes his time with me since we’ve feminized him, and I love it. We talk more, we don’t rush, we really connect emotionally. I would never go back to how it was before.
My husband’s little clitty and pussy
He’s had 10 years of very low-testosterone and now for 7 years taking 5000mg of fenugreek capsules and progesterone cream-chest massage each day, his annual physical blood test shows him in the bottom 3% of testosterone. However, he now has elevated oestrogen levels.
The good news is, this all worked to soften his enlarged prostate. What it also did was to shronk his penis to just a little limp 2″ knob that disappears into lots of soft skin down in his panties. So we’ve come up with a few new things.
The only way for him to climax is when he is relaxed on his back, legs wide apart and we gently use my vibrator. I told him it’s very much how a woman orgasms. He’s completely flaccid and with lots of practice now has that first major orgasm, sensation, but with patience (something we never had before) he can have a second and third wave wash over him.
I encourage him with a “please coo and moan like me” and he does. Our routine now always finishes up in the bathroom getting ourselves back together, and my reward for him is a Gentle-Glide tampon and set the string very obvious showing outside the panty crotch or thong strap. He can take it out later before we go to bed for the night.
Tampons after intimacy opened up curiosity about maxi-pads. I’m way past menopause but I obliged his interests. We buy a 24 pack of Stay-Free each month and he’s really into the very convincing ‘V’ he shows when he flattens out between his legs with a pad wedged in tight panties.
He’s got little down there these days. His little 2″ knob disappears back into the loose skin, so he’s tucked away all day. I suggested he add lavender body lotion in the pad before he pulls it in tight so he’ll feel all moist as a reminder.
I do smile now to think as I head to the kitchen he’s so happy quiet nice calm relaxed fun to talk with and a good listener being girly feminine. I do fun little shocks once in a while like asking, “is your pad nice and wet, do you want to change to a fresh one?” and things like that.
Let’s just say we have played around with so many things to try out that for us girls are just who we are and what we do. I have now added so many other female routines to his routines too. I have yet to suggest something he did not agree to try with me.
Living in an FLR with a feminized husband
It’s been quite fun is to go away for a weekend as two girlfriends. Drive to Palm Springs, San Diego, Orange County, up to Santa Barbara wine country. We get a hotel Friday and Saturday nights.
My husband leaves home as Mary and stays feminine the entire time from Friday morning until we’re back home Sunday night. He packs only his women’s clothing so there’s no chance for a safety net – he’s always Mary.
It’s always fun to go out to the garden and find ‘Mary’ trimming roses or other vines in cute white shorts showing panty lines, with bra and cami-straps peeking out of the tank top.
He’s making pancakes as I type this. He has a white terri-robe over tap pant and cami PJs he slept in, hair up in a twist with a scrunchy. He makes sure to always shave his face super close first thing after waking up.
He was very fair blonde with only light facial hair, barely noticeable in the morning. It’s now all white and grey so it’s nice to see him for the first time when we wake up and he’s already smooth and Oil of Olay soft and smelling pretty.
Our FLR works because it’s real
I don’t think of myself as a mistress as I don’t order Mary around or require him to do things. I also don’t use any humiliation although I know Lady Alexa does in her FLR – it’s what works for each couple. All this has worked because I have always gone very slow, kind, easy pace, and never pushed for doing more too quickly. In this, Lady Alexa and I are very similar. We didn’t want to spook our husbands.
My style has always been, “Honey, I’d so love you to wear these,” or, “It’s so fun as a woman to do this“. I then gently and lovingly offer the same to him and prod him along a bit with my patented assurance of, “Hey it’s just us right?“
Because of our children, their partners, grandkids, and extended family we have zero plans for Mary to transition full-time. In so many circles of friends and families, he’s actually become a much better and nicer husband.
We keep this mostly around the house. We do go out in public as two women to shop, go to movies, dine out. It’s always 30 minutes or more from home so we don’t run into people we know. Otherwise, as in Lady Alexa’s relationship, my husband is a girl around the home.
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Sally Bend says
Wow, so much to take in here, but all lovely! Thank you so much, Cathy, for sharing your experiences. It’s wonderful hearing about how many couples are not only open to this, but have made it work.
Lady Alexa says
It was quite a story. Cathy kindly allowed me to share it and even sent the photos of her husband Mary
Michelle says
Thank you Lady Alexa and to Cathy. This is unusual and does not denograte or ďomjinate. There is too much stigma and hypocrisy all around.
What happens whem a masculne hard working tomboy prefers her man be kept feminine and as a traditional housewife in every way, including mannerisms? If he is ok with this they are matching opposites who love care and share.
Jennie Jaye says
How wonderful and loving. In my opinion if an FLR is approached as loving and encouraging there is no fear…only acceptance. It’s not for everybody …but it is for some.
On the other hand when your partner is not in an FLR way…acceptance can be daunting to say the least. In my case, my wife is sensing that this “new-found” feminine husband can be …well…OK and not threatening. It’s challenging for her…I have to be patient…but I sense acceptance is growing and FEAR is fading. I see this based on some Christmas gifts that I received that were definitely NOT in the male way…like cosmetic Face mask and perfumed lotions. Something a MAN does NOT receive from his spouse.
Perhaps time will be the healer of FEAR …and ACCEPTANCE will start to bloom.
Jennie Jaye
Lady Alexa says
That’s good news that your wife is beginning to understand the benefits of a feminised husband. Not everyone is like Cathy and me and some need more time
Michyle says
A very beautiful story of voluntary feminization by you and your husband.
Lady Alexa says
I think Cathy’s approach was wonderful and encouraging
jim serdut says
what a hot story……………..
Sam says
Wow! Wonderful life for them both!!
Lady Alexa says
And how things should be
Eve says
If only more Women felt that this was the right way to a happy life.
wifey says
Lady Alexa:
Thanks for posting this story. Its always nice to hear how others have experienced and taken the journey of the feminized male. Its interesting what is similar and different in the process from one couple to another. I must say that Mary has a naturally fem body just like the hot little bod that your Alice has. Thanks for sharing.
Lady Alexa says
Well thank you in behalf of Alice. Alice’s best feature are her legs although her flat chest is a disappointment when compared to Cathy’s husband
Cathy Peterson says
In all fairness, the photos of my Mike’s very feminine breasts and cleavage are a combination of real, all-natural, full, round, jiggly breast tissue development – BUT also squeezed comfortably into a silicon Nu-Bra to get that deep cleavage pressed in look, and then the padded push up bra over top fits snug and hides completely the Nu-Bra, while lifting everything up higher. The scoop-neck top gives that amazing peak at the tops of his breast tissue, while the padding in the bottom of the cups fills out the overall “look”.
Morgan says
Your story is wonderful and inspiring. We are an older couple starting our journey of feminization. Much of it is based on my desire to serve in exchange for acceptance. Not a bad bargain. I would love to be able to contact you and share notes.
Lady Alexa says
I hope it all goes well morgan
Jayme Erin Hendricksen says
I recently (in August) read your postings in Fictionmania regarding your use of a breast pump for Mary. I loved reading about you two. Then it went missing from Fictionmania. Are you planning a book instead. Please tell me yes. I envy you two soooooo very much
Thomas says
Wow… This is interesting and intriguing!
How daring they are that they even go to restaurants and shops dressed as girlfriends!
Although I think that it would be enough if her husband would wear feminine clothes at home to please Kathy and some under male clothes when on the street – but this is the way they have chosen and liked. (S)he, Mike/Mary is very delicately feminine especially in that grey skirt on the first picture.
I especially like the mutual gentleness in their relationship – and the fact that it is the essence of their way. I like that they discovered the plus possibilities feminine body qualities and gentleness of the man might mean for women in a sexual relationship.
I like that it is a „spanking-free” relationship.
And this is a „gender enriched” relationship the way I find somehow logical – he gives his bigger male strength by doing a greater part of the housework than her (as far as I understand) and so he remains man in that. And he gets some feminine character in turn from his wife – some calmness and peace, some plus gentleness and sexyness, more possibility than usual to give sexual pleasure to his wife (also by being sexy himself/herself) and to be pleased by her pleasure then.
It is interesting that they changed his body so that his penis or male clit was reduced to a small size. Taking hormones proved to be useful in shrinking his swollen prostate and that was beneficial – but I like your approach better with using your husband’s normal sized male clit fully. And I like the health centred approach of yours with visiting the gym (together?) and making exercises to form Alice’s waist slimmer and her(/his) breast bigger. Somewhat bigger breasts for men sounds strangely erotic and attractive to me although I doubt I would increase mine. Notwithstanding, I find the idea of „tit-centred erotics” – or discovering the tits more than usual as erogenous zones both for women and for men – an exciting possibility. And also the „art” of „gently dominant kissing” directed by the female partner and the „feminization” of the man’s mouth with that. These are two possibilities the deeper discovery of which might make sexual life even more enjoyable for both partners. I consider these to be discovered more in my own marriage.
I live in a „vanilla” marriage with my wife except that I enjoy serving her in bed and our sexual life being centred around her pleasure. Ours is not really WLM although I become more and more gentle and meek with her as years go by and she is the one who manages our finances and makes most practical decisions in that field (although I practically have a right to veto, I use it very rarely).
Lady Alexa says
Yes it was a fascinating account showing the non-fetish reality of a real life FLR with a feminised husband. I think everyone is different and I’m probably a little more ‘mistressy’ than Cathy but equally caring for the well-being and needs of my husband. Any real FLR is similar to mine and Cathy’s. For me I do have to be careful not to push my agenda too hard and I want to listen to ALice’s views and opinions too and for her to be comfortable. It’s why I use a softly-softly approach to her feminisation. And yes we visit the gym together. Having a husband with female-looking breasts, feminine body and a decent-sized functioning clitty is an erotic and exciting prospect for me. I love the idea of the combination. It remains to be seen just how realistic Alice’s breasts can be with just exercise and vacuum pumps.
jim serdut says
I like hearing the progression of your spouse. I love your devious mind.
Jyneen St.John says
Do you know how I could meet a woman interested in meeting me. I would love to be in a FLR am more than willing to submit to her total control and feminazintion
Lady Alexa says
Click on ASK LADY ALEXA and follow the instructions
Cathy Peterson says
Hi Thomas – Just to clarify, my husband has not done any kinds of female hormones. He is about 7 years into taking daily 5,000mg of 100% natural fenugreek gel-caps from GNC, and twice daily massaging in Source Naturals Progesterone Cream (the best are always “all natural” and “paraben free” – meaning NO preservatives at all). These did not work right away, took several months to really see noticeable results, so patience and persistence are key.
Lady Alexa says
Hello Cathy, I did try to reply to your last mail but my mails have started to be returned as undelivered due to a spam filter setting? Alexa
Cathy Peterson says
Sorry to hear that Alexa. I’ll send you a new email this morning and hopefully you’ll get it and your reply will come right through to my inbox.
Thomas says
Dear Cathy, thank you for the information! Yes, I have already read about fenugreek at some places (like this https://www.fenugreekworld.com/about-me/ )
colly says
Dear Lady A.
Another inspirational story of how loving relationships can blossom. So happy for Cathy and for Mary. Also a little jealous of Marys style. Love the dressing for work while working from home. Trying that myself occasionally though hard to remember not to open the door or go outside as feels so natural. Things still progressing this end and SO more accepting of a feminine side for me at set times. She even asked for playtime with her this week. There’s a little more but wouldn’t like to reveal publicly … None of this would have happened without Your inspiration and Alice’s progress. Now with Cathy and Mary too, it feels like there’s hope at last x x
Lady Alexa says
Hello Colly, yes Alice does something very similar by dressing for work as she works at home too. very convenient. I’m pleased things ar elooking up on the feminisation side.
Darla says
As others have mentioned, what a nice true story of a couple truly in love. And kudos to “Mary” for accepting such a wonderful lifestyle. For most of us, we will never get as close to that kind of relationship.
Thank you for sharing.
Lady Alexa says
I think once we show males that it’s better for them to be female they see this
Patti59 says
Such a wonderful story, and another tribute to male femininity! It is so delightful to see more and more women not only accept male feminization, but to encourage it. What a better world it will be when more men and boys are feminine and sweet!
Lady Alexa says
I agree of course. Feminine men are so much more attractive
Bea says
Lady A, Thank you so much for publishing this quite different take on an FLR and Cathy-Thank You and your lovely husband `Mary`. It is so encouraging and your pursuit of a different relationship seems so gentle,it was wonderful. Was it really ` spare of the moment` decision diven by a lack lustre situation or had you been speculating/wondering of deciding just how to pursue this.It is gorgeous how easily it seems `Mike` slipped into `Mary`. I introduced my fiance to `Bea` on our second date and she has been the one to encourage me to embrace it.We have ticked off several firsts on your and Lady A`s bucket list, not sequentialy of course, but in our own style.I live as Bea most evenings and with a few select friends-when the electrolysis has worked sufficiently then we will venture out more.od ask Lady A for my email/Flickr- We can build this community and hoepfully an antidote to the Trump/testosterone machismo poisoning.
Kindest regards Bea.
Lady Alexa says
It wasn’t my list it was Cathy and Mary’s. It has inspired me to write my own feminisation bucket list though. I do think that there is a girl inside every man (to use a sub title from one of my books). Sometimes she’s well hidden and unknown as in Alice’s case. But she was there just waiting for me to tease her out 🙂
Bea says
Lady A, Thank you so much for publishing this quite different take on an FLR and Cathy-Thank You and your lovely husband `Mary`. It is so encouraging and your pursuit of a different relationship seems so gentle,it was wonderful. Was it really ` spare of the moment` decision diven by a lack lustre situation or had you been speculating/wondering of deciding just how to pursue this.It is gorgeous how easily it seems `Mike` slipped into `Mary`. I introduced my fiance to `Bea` on our second date and she has been the one to encourage me to embrace it.We have ticked off several firsts on your and Lady A`s bucket list, not sequentialy of course, but in our own style.I live as Bea most evenings and with a few select friends-when the electrolysis has worked sufficiently then we will venture out more.od ask Lady A for my email/Flickr- We can build this community and hopefully an antidote to the Trump/testosterone machismo poisoning.
Kindest regards Bea.e
Lady Alexa says
I’m not altogether sure it’s a different take Bea. I think it’s a more realistic take of what a real FLR and real ‘encouraged’ male feminisation would look like. In my own FLR I do like to play the domme at times but 95% of the time real life is going on. You can realistically spend your marriage spanking your husband
Cathy (and Mike) Peterson says
For Bea, In all our years of marriage, I had never considered FLR/feminization with Mike. It truly was spur-of-the-moment that rainy wintry day when we just got very spontaneous in our at-home spa day. I thought shaving his legs, or trying a little nail polish on him, along with hot oil hair conditioner and facial masque would have been plenty, but something just felt like “Try it…” in suggesting to him going a bit further with some of my clothing. I have looked back on that and do believe that had he been very firm with “No” to underthings and a dress (like me) for our fancy dinner, that might have been the end of it. Who knows. But once completely dressed, it was just so much easier and natural to add on full cosmetics, hairspray, jewelry, perfume …. and I think we were both in a “what are we doing?” mode as we ate dinner, then coffee and dessert, and then eventually going back to our bedroom. Mike has always said, “It’s been nice to step over to the other side and just go with it”.
Bea says
Hi Cathy and Mike,Thank you so much for a kind and considerate reply.It is quite unusual,I think to hear of a couple who just engage in a `spur of the moment` thing and allow it to develop so beautifully.`Cathy` as a fluid identity is really interesting.We, (my fiance and I) have a similar arrangement,perhaps `expectation` is more accurate.And as `Bea` becomes more a part of our lives, the influence and effect is profound. I find myself preferring to stay smooth all over,I have ditched all my male underwear and wear lingerie every day beneath my work clothes.(Yes, and stay tucked 99% of the time) I am having electrolysis and have had several sessions with a gender counsellor who encourages `Bea` quite openly…if an evening passes without me stepping into myself(Bea) then I get way more irritable- which is both amusing (because I and my partner both notice it) and frustrating.My male identity slips between just a little uncomfortable – low level;I`ve presented/been accepted as male for years. And, being really,really uncomfortable.But the difficulty is `Bea` becoming herself-she`s had no adolescence to test and refine her self, nor has she had that whole experimental phase,nor will she-Well, not as a teenager,anyhow,lol. So I have to accept, my partner probably knows what suits me/Bea better than I do..Okay I think this is getting a little too long. I`m happy to message with people and would love to hear from others in a similar situation.
Kindest regards Bea
`Bea` says
Hi Cathy and Mike P,Thank you so much for a kind and considerate reply.It is quite unusual,I think to hear of a couple who just engage in a `spur of the moment` thing and allow it to develop so beautifully.`Cathy` as a fluid identity is really interesting.We, (my fiance and I) have a similar arrangement,perhaps `expectation` is more accurate.And as `Bea` becomes more a part of our lives, the influence and effect is profound. I find myself preferring to stay smooth all over,I have ditched all my male underwear and wear lingerie every day beneath my work clothes.(Yes, and stay tucked 99% of the time) I am having electrolysis and have had several sessions with a gender counsellor who encourages `Bea` quite openly…if an evening passes without me stepping into myself(Bea) then I get way more irritable- which is both amusing (because I and my partner both notice it) and frustrating.My male identity slips between just a little uncomfortable – low level;I`ve presented/been accepted as male for years. And, being really,really uncomfortable.But the difficulty is `Bea` becoming herself-she`s had no adolescence to test and refine her self, nor has she had that whole experimental phase,nor will she-Well, not as a teenager,anyhow,lol. So I have to accept, my partner probably knows what suits me/Bea better than I do..Okay I think this is getting a little too long. I`m happy to message with people and would love to hear from others in a similar situation.
Kindest regards Bea.
Lady Alexa says
To jump in the conversation (well it is my blog) my own FLR / husband feminisation wasn’t planned either so I’m not sure it’s so unusual. It started as a very low-level cross dressing bedroom game and escalated from there.
`Bea` says
Hi Lady A, Oh alright then, I s`pose so,it is your blog.But really,who claims ownership of the net?
To present and `manifest` as something other than stereotypical male is a process,I`m sure.And one which I relish.(Oh that`s such a grand term, lol)
But `becoming` is wonderful. I will present more openly when I am less obviously male, I am `Bea` visibly and frequently amongst select friends-it`s such a work in progress and really,its not about `passing` but about not challenging people such as to provoke significant conflict…
regards Bea
Bea says
Hi everyone,
My question is this- How do the females and males conceptualise their partners in this-Do they see them as women;trans-women;de-maled men (that perveresely reinsofrces stereotypes lol), or sissies?
I ask, because mockery, shame and derision have been a common currency for many in relationships (my previous ones included)
I do not need to be `loud and proud`,just quietly accepted and appreciated.
kindest regards Bea
Cathy Peterson says
Re: “how do we conceptualize them?” – Mike is still the love of my life, the guy I married, father to our 2 sons, grandfather, brother-in-law, uncle, longtime co-worker at his firm, and great friend to other men (and gals) among the couples we’ve known for years. In fact, we discussed and then agreed that our Valentine’s Day plan this year is with another couple, and I’m very happy to have my Mike in white dinner jacket, crisp white dress shirt, black bow tie with black slacks, buying me red roses, and our double-date to a very nice restaurant in Manhattan Beach tomorrow evening. As a woman, I remain quite heterosexual, very attracted to men and not to any women. So I would say that when I see “Mary” around the house, or we go out in public together as two women, I still always know deep inside “THIS is my husband” but we are having our own secret kind of fun. He really likes women’s clothing, hair, nails, make-up, jewelry – and I thoroughly enjoy playing along right beside him. All his “Bucket-List” interests made for some interesting conversations as he’s asked about virtually everything we women do, and can he give that a try too? so I’ve enjoyed helping him with these. The BEST part is that without saying it directly to him, we are now in a truly FLR where he has naturally taken a back seat to my interests, leading, directing, and he seems very content to wait on me and follow my lead on just about everything we do. As such, he is also quieter, calm, relaxed, courteous, thoughtful, a great listener, and overall just a softer NICER version of the man I married.
Sophie says
lovely story and very nice to see how the FLR so effectively is functioning. I really like the approach of feminising husbands into normal women. I m also into feminisation and stories of Lady Alexa and Cathy are inspiring. The transformation in thinking like a woman , dressing like a woman is so necessary for a successful FLR. I am so very glad for FLR and trying my bit to be like Alice and Mary…
Sophie says
Hi I have totally enjoyed reading Cathy’s story.. Thanks to Lady Alexa I had made my own steps to feminization and I am progressing as a feminized male. I am in a FLR with my wife and serve both her and her mother. Its otherwise a private thing known between the three of us though I wear bras and panties (knickers) full time.. I enjoy FLR and becoming a woman companion to my wife. Though I wouldn’t say I am as complete a woman as Alice or Mary, I know I like how I am – Sophie
Bea says
So,I will reply to Sophie.If Lady Alexa will excuse the intrusion.
A question firstly,
How can we think LIKE someone else,unless we ARE,someone else?”
We can conceptualise, imagine,hope,believe.But is this actual?…
We cannot know.
“You are what you is”( to quote a much maligned and praised musician)
My cis-gendered partner says she experiences `me` as female.And the change when I `become or present as`Bea` is quite marked.This parallels Cathys experience,which amuses me no end.Her husband `Mike`-as `Mary` is thoughtful and sensitive.
when I am `Bea` select friends say I lose the brittle,frenetic quality,that`s surprising because at 53yrs old,I thought I ha lost that anyhow-Apparently not,lol.
So the women out there, do tell us, how you experience your partners,you know-lets hear the external and internal perceptions
kindest regards Bea
Carla says
I’m not sure how to to introduce myself, but my name is ” Carla ”. I have been reading and learning about Flr for quite some time. Just recently I came across this site and and realized this is what I have been looking for. A real perspective /discussion /blog on actual Flr without the hype, fantasy, and well, without the junk! I have enjoyed everything immensely so far and hope to continue reading… I don’t feel so alone in my ideas or interests now! Thank you.
Carla
Bea says
Hi Carla,Allow me to welcome you to the new world of FLR. Do enjoy the conversation and thank Lady A and Cathy for the inspiring contributions.
regards Bea
Carla says
Thank you for the welcome. I will be sure to do so!
Lady Alexa says
Hello Carla pleased you can join me here at my world of male feminisation and flr
Carla says
Hello Lady Alexa. Thank you, and thanks to Alice, Cathy, and Mary for their contributions and insight into a real world flr. I had found your world by doing random Google searches with key words. After filtering through many pinterest, Tumblr, and random porn searches I was lucky enough to discover your site. What I enjoy is the love I see in the writings and the value of the relationship itself. What I see or did see with most of my searches was the exaggerated fantasy with degraded and humiliated sissies being treated cruelly, tons of cuckold, etc. If that’s what someone wants, then power to them, but it wasn’t for me. My searches led me through Craigslist (ugh), fet life, collarme, date a sissy or cd, and so on… It was the same thing. Cruel harsh dominatrices, or doms, humiliation, ramming huge things into orifices, and again just not what I wanted. Anyway, i enjoy reading your entries, the conversations, and mostly the reality based feminization /flr that you and Alice have.
jim serdut says
well said………..
slave sindee says
Thank You for sharing such a loving relationship.
i can only dream that mine would have turned out that way instead of a divorce after being mt nested. She decided she wanted something different and this lifestyle is not Her style.
So thank you for sharing
Lady Alexa says
I’m very sorry to hear that. I hope you find someone more amenable to having a feminised man
slave sindee says
Thank You
Carla says
Hello Sindee.
I’m Carla, a new fan of this place and i pop in and out and saw your post. I do know what it’s like to share this part of yourself and be rejected for it, although i don’t know how long you were married…
I do hope you find someone (or they find you).. I know its hard being alone in the beginning, but i think in time you may find yourself feeling better..hiding that from a SO can be draining and so frustrating. Good luck to you!
slave sindee says
Thank You Carla
Jenn says
What a wonderful story of Mary’s complete feminisation but what I find most interesting is that it was done in a very loving, caring and respectful way. Now I am not knocking forced feminisation, for some couples this seems to be a rather popular form of a FLR and women who assert their authority this way have every right to do so. But Cathy brought Mary into the female world to experience much more than just the clothing but to experience sensations and feelings of being a woman and treating him as such. Their closeness shows in outings they share together whether they go shopping or out to restaurants and it is Mary’s confidence and trust in Cathy that has made his feminisation so successful. Speaking from my own experiences being out as Jenn with my wonderful wife Susan I know it takes a lot of courage and I probably could never have done it alone. It takes a very dedicated woman to encourage and teach us what we need to know to step into their world and I have no doubt that Cathy is very proud of her husband Mary.
Jenn
Lady Alexa says
A real flr should always be loving. We are improving our husbands through guidance and leadership and through feminisation
CLINT says
I have always wanted to be a womans wife. I would just love to be in a FLR and more so married into it at the wedding with vows reflecting that she is in total control.
Diana Pearson says
I truly think that more wives would love this lifestyle but think that a more aggressive approach is needed-if they only knew…
Also the atmosphere of homelife would be such a quiet, gentle one as well!
Lady Alexa says
I think you’re right Diana. Males react well to discipline
teddy says
in my case, it is not a case of being feminised but one of being treated as if I as still a small boy. so my clothing is appropriate to that and much of the rest follows too. Early bedtimes (same time as 12 year old step son) and in so many ways being treated as if he and I are equals which I suppose we are
Because to the love (and that is what we share with your family) it works for us. I am very happy
Stephanie says
Loved the story up until the part about the Tampon. We all know that is not possible. What if the string broke??
Lady Alexa says
It’s not my story, it’s a guest post from a reader so I can’t comment except to ask why the tampon is not possible? I don’t get your point
Steve Wise says
It is not possible for a man to wear a tampon stuck inside of him. What if when he tried to pull it out the string broke and it got stuck inside of him. Do you know of any men that have wore tampons?
Lady Alexa says
Nope, but I imagine those men who have had their bum channel stretched wide may achieve it? TBH I’m not that bothered one way or the other as I’m not expecting my husband to wear one.
Clinton L McDade says
I have always wanted an FLR blended with a Role Reversal Marriage. More specific to be her bride, literally married into it, and having a very supportive Mother-in-Law.
Bruce says
Dear Cathy and Lady Alexa,
I am a long time cross dresser who has been married for 39 years, My wife has known from the start and has become more accepting over time, yet I wish she would accept and enjoy it to the level described in your story. We have two grown children who are out of the house now. Over time we have become less and less intimate and she seems not to want sex anymore which I can understand since I never was very large and my blood pressure medicine has made it very difficult to get erect. I love the way Cathy helped her husband along and would love the same from my wife but just don’t know how to approach it. I am frightened of rejection since the last few times I have tried to initiate any type of intimacy she is not interested. Otherwise we have a good relationship except she can get a little bossy. I don’t mind being submissive but just want her to be kind about it the way Cathy was. Any suggestions? Please don’t notify me of response by e-mail if you can avoid it as we share the e-mail and I would like to get some advice before proceeding. I will check this page for a response periodically. Thank you Bruce
Bruce Clymer says
Hi, Did my previous post go through? It disappeared from the comments page –just wondering — — If not I will re-post –Thanks, Bruce
Lady Alexa says
It got through but I or Alice like to check comments from new commenters first before authorising
Bruce says
OK, that is understandable — hope to hear from you soon –thanks, Bruce
Lady Alexa says
You’re auto approved now so your comments should go straight up
Bruce says
That’s nice –thank you
Eugenia says
My heart melted at the part where she told him to pick himself out a dress, and he chose the one he loved most without hesitation. I have never forgotten my first dress I wore.
Sleeveless floral print, and full length. It was like a wave of femininity just washed over me as I put it on. I couldn’t stop looking in the mirror, and twirling for five minutes.